Moving On
by Lynn DiNozzo
Summary: Sequel to "Heartbreak" Tony raising Talia, his daughter, on his own without Ziva. - Those were the moments that Tony cherished the most. He just wished Ziva was there to share them.


_A/N: Hi everyone! This story is a sequel to one of my previous stories "Heartbreak" so if you haven't read that, this story won't be as meaningful. I think this is pretty self-explanatory without reading "Heartbreak" but it'd be better if you did! This is one of my favorite stories, so I hope it turns out to be one of yours! ~Lynn D._

* * *

Violent cries awoke Tony out of a restless sleep. He jumped out of bed and ran into the small, dark room across from his and picked up the crying little girl. "Hey honey, what's the matter?" he cooed, trying to calm his daughter's cries. "Is somebody still teething? Huh? I know that doesn't feel good," he sympathized. Every time he asked her a question, he was answered with little whimpers.

Tony gently brushed his hand over her little head that was already full of curly, brown hair. Holding Talia tightly to his chest, he walked into the nearby bathroom and ran some warm water. After putting a small washcloth under the stream and wringing it out a bit, he handed it to Talia who was crying softly into his chest. She clumsily accepted the warm cloth and instinctively stuck it into her mouth, soothing her sore gums.

Once she was feeling a bit better, it didn't take the little girl long to fall back to sleep. Feeling her breathing even out, he rubbed her back then carried her back into the nursery. Gently putting her into her crib, he smiled at her now peaceful expression. It had been 4 months now after Ziva's death and he was beginning to be able to cope without her. Yet he knew her memory would never fade.

The first month was the hardest for him. The team had tried to help, but they were just as heartbroken as him. Raising an infant on his own was probably the hardest thing he'd ever done. Tony was thankful that the every-three-hour feedings were beginning to wear down a little bit. He was still a federal agent and needed his sleep.

Gibbs had given him a month off after his daughter was born for him to get used to everything that had happened, or at least cope, but after the month was up, Talia was put into the NCIS child care program downstairs, so he could be as close as possible while still working. He did still have to pay the bills.

Once he was sure that his little girl was safely tucked in and asleep, he headed back into his own dark, empty room. Rubbing his hand over his face, he sat down on the side of the bed, lost in thought and memories. Lately he'd been dreaming a lot about Ziva, her smile, her eyes, her love. Letting out a deep breath, he snuggled back under the covers, but he found he was kept awake with the thought of his wife.

Every time he was on the verge of sleep, memories of his wife kept coming back. He desperately missed having her by his side as they slept. She had become his comfort, his security blanket. Thinking back to when they first shared a bed together, a faint smile crossed his face.

When Gibbs first told them what their undercover assignment was going to be, they thought it was a joke but when they ended up in a hotel room together, everything became really real, really fast.

For some reason, it didn't feel awkward to either them. They had always felt natural around each other, so sharing the same bed was more of a comfort after a long day than anything else. What he wouldn't do to have her back for one more night, just to cuddle. That was Ziva's favorite thing to do. _"I just want to snuggle,"_ was her favorite line, Tony recalled with a glimmer of sadness in his eyes. Snuggling down deeper into the mattress, he drifted off to sleep with her fresh in his mind.

* * *

Talia looked up to her dad with her big, brown eyes. "Daddy?"

While Tony was stirring the batter for their corn muffins that would go with their soup dinner, he looked over to Talia who was sitting in her booster seat on the bar right across from him. "Yea Rosie? What is it?" He had begun calling her Rosie only a few months ago when she had turned four and since it was her middle name, it just stuck.

"Why don't I have a mommy?"

Tony's heart sunk as he stopped stirring and gave his daughter his full attention. "Your mom didn't want to leave us, honey. She loved us both so, so much," he explained, with sorrow and love shining through his eyes.

"Then why isn't she here?" Talia asked with young curiosity.

"She's in heaven with the angels. You remember when we talked about God and heaven?"

"Yes," she said, still not quite understanding where Ziva was.

Moving over to her side, he brushed a hand over her curls. "Rosie, sometimes life is hard and the people we love aren't always here to tell us they love us. But," he smiled, "I can tell you this for sure. Mommy loves you. Remember that, okay?"

Smiling up at her dad and giving him a peck on the cheek, she nodded. "Okay."

After consoling his daughter, Tony went back over to their dinner to finish preparing it, promising himself that he would never let Ziva's memory die along with her. From that moment on, he knew that he had a daughter to raise on his own and he was going to do his absolute best to teach her between right and wrong and hopefully she'd turn out just as great as her mom.

* * *

"Dad! Did the movie store have Narnia?" Talia called from her room as she heard Tony come home.

"That it did. You, my dear, have wonderful taste in films!" Tony said as he came into her room, handing her the movie. He let out a chuckle as she was hurriedly running around her room setting up sleeping bags and arranging pillows just perfectly for her sleepover that night.

He wasn't quite sure what twelve year olds usually acted like, but he was sure this was pretty close. It was days like these that he really missed having Ziva around to help him. Tony had always been a little scared of kids. Talia was different, she was his own daughter, but when it came to other people's, he just wasn't quite sure what to do with them.

Tony knew Ziva would have loved having Talia's friends over, especially to cook for them. She was an amazing cook and he always caught her smiling when she was in the kitchen. Ziva was the one person who could try new things all the time and each time it would turn out perfectly. "Rosie, they are your friends, I don't think they're going to freak out if their pillow is a half an inch off center."

She let out a deep breath, stopping for a few moments then looked to him. "I know, dad, I just want everything to be perfect. It's my first sleepover and I…I want it to be perfect!"

Wrapping his arms around his daughter, he rubbed her back. "Nothing in life is going to be perfect, but," he smiled, "you, my dear, are doing a wonderful job! Now, until your friends get here in—"

"—37 minutes," Talia interjected excitedly.

"Alright," he smirked. "In those 37 minutes I want you to go in the backyard and chill. You're going to have _plenty_ of fun with your friends tonight. You're going to need a little bit of calm before the storm."

Looking around her room, making sure everything was in its right spot, she hesitantly nodded. "Okay." As she headed down the hallway she turned back to him. "Will you please tell me when you see them coming?"

"Of course!" he assured, shooing her off to her backyard hideaway.

Stepping off the backyard patio, Talia climbed into the old porch swing that Tony had attached to their old oak tree. It had always been Ziva's favorite spot to read and relax, so it wasn't a surprise when their daughter had quickly adopted the place as her own.

Tony was glad to see that it didn't stay empty for long once she had learned how to walk. The two had spent countless Saturday afternoons basking in the warm sun together in that swing reading stories, singing songs, and sometimes just having heart to hearts. Those were the moments that Tony cherished the most. He just wished Ziva was there to share them.

While Talia was in the backyard resting for a while, Tony was running around himself getting the house ready for guests. The team had been extremely busy all week with two heavy caseloads, so the house was not in its best condition.

Starting at the front of the house, he went through and grabbed anything and everything that was scattered on the floors, tables, chairs, and anything else he could find. After his arms were full, he dumped it all into his closet with the promise to clean it all up the next day.

He wasn't the kind of guy who was extremely messy, but he was an agent on long hours with the addition of having a twelve year old girl. He had realized early on that it wasn't just boys who had messy rooms. Talia was pretty good at keeping things clean, but there was the occasional week now and then that things got out hand. Unfortunately for him, this was one of those weeks.

With it being the middle of March, everyone was on spring break, so with having Talia home and a bit restless, things were definitely thrown around a bit more carelessly than usual. He knew what that was about. A day off of work usually meant a whole day of movies with his daughter with pizza boxes thrown carelessly on the floor and empty bags of chips on the coffee table.

Once he was satisfied with the house, he leaned against the kitchen counter and checked his watch. With it being 5:45 pm he only had fifteen more minutes to tie up any loose ends before all hell broke loose. Even though there were only four of Talia's closest friends coming, he knew well enough that with five girls running around the house things could get really crazy really fast.

Running through his mental checklist that he had made the second Talia had even mentioned having a sleepover, he was happy to realize that he had only one more thing to do. Tony figured he could wait until all of the girls arrived to order their pizza dinner. They'd be far too excited when they first got there to sit down and eat something.

With only a few more minutes until show time, he wandered out back to go get his daughter. Sitting down on the swing alongside of her, he nudged her shoulder. "You ready? Excited?"

Biting her lip, she nodded her head. "I think so," she said not convincingly, as if she were running her own mental checklist over and over in her mind. "But yes, I'm very excited!"

"Like I said before, you're all going to have a blast! Before you know it, it's going to be morning. Trust me! I had my share of sleepovers in my teenaged years; I know what they're like."

"Yours were probably a lot different though," she mused with a faint smile. "I mean, boys like to have fun in really different ways."

"And what ways would those be?" he asked curiously, wondering how much his daughter knew about the male behavior in her young years.

Shrugging her shoulders, she looked towards Tony. "I don't know. They're just…different. Take David for instance—"

"—The guy in your class, right? The one who's always sitting next to you and annoying you?" Tony asked with a smile. He knew good and well that David liked his daughter; he was just too much of a boy to do anything more than annoy her about it.

"Yea, that's him. Well, he's just always teasing me and bugging me. It's annoying. I can't imagine what a room full of them without anyone else around is like. It must be torture."

Snickering, he patted her hand. "When I was having my own sleepovers, I know one thing was for sure. We weren't thinking about girls, that didn't come until later. You've gotta understand something, Rosie. Girls mature _a lot_ faster than guys; at their age right where you are they're still thinking about their pokemon cards. Sometimes one or two of them slip through the cracks and already thinking about girls, but trust me, the interest in girls won't start until they're around fifteen."

Wrinkling her brow, Talia cocked her head to the side. "Really?" she asked, completely in shock. "Then why do they bug us so much if they don't care about us?"

"It's in their nature, babe. It's what we've always done, something fun to do."

"Well, boys are stupid."

Laughing, he nodded. "Yup, we are."

Leaning over to give her dad a hug, she shook her head. "No dad, _you're_ not stupid, just the guys in my class. They're absolute knuckleheads."

Checking his watch one last time, he looked over to Talia. "Guess what time it is!"

Her eyes lit up. "It's six already?"

"It sure is! Why don't you go inside and wait for your friends, I'll be in pretty soon."

"Okay, Dad," she called as she headed towards the door. As she was almost ready to turn the handle to go inside, she turned back and gave her dad a hug.

Looking down at her, he scratched his head with a smile. "Well what'd I do and please tell me so I can do it again!"

Letting go of him, she shrugged her shoulders. "There are a lot of kids in my class that only have one parent or two that are always fighting. Even though mom isn't here, I just wanna let you know you're doing a great job!" Running into the house, Talia started double checking everything in the final seconds.

Tony was glued to the spot he was in, completely bewildered. He knew he was doing an okay job, but hearing his own daughter telling him that he was doing a "great job" made his whole day, week, month, and year. All in the same moment. He knew Ziva would be so proud, and that's what he was trying for ever since Talia came into the world. A call from his daughter to come inside alerted him to go back into dad mode and get the party on the road.

* * *

Listening to all the laughter that was coming from Talia's room made Tony smile. He knew it was hours and hours past their bedtimes but who was he kidding? Sleepovers weren't meant for sleeping anyway. When it hit 11:30pm he had everyone brush their teeth and get into their pajamas, but he knew he wouldn't be able to do anything more. Trying to get hyper pre-teens asleep was a challenge he wasn't even going to attempt.

After deciding that it would be okay to leave them be for a while, he had escaped to his room. Now that it was nearing 1:00 am he decided he'd take a quick shower then head to bed. There was no way he was going to stay up with them all night.

Once he was clean and in his own pajamas, he made his routine trip around the house, checking windows and doors making sure they were locked. After he had turned out all of the lights and turned on the front porch's lights he stuck his head into Talia's room which quickly stopped everyone's chatter. Flashing his famous smile he smirked. "Alright girls, I'm going to go to bed now. Does anyone need anything before I do?"

With everyone shaking their heads, he bid them a goodnight then headed back into his own room. Closing his door, he put a movie in to fall asleep to.

* * *

"DiNozzo! Answer the damn phone already." Gibbs shouted from across the bullpen. Tony's phone had been ringing for the past minute and he was frantically searching for it. He knew it had to be around his desk somewhere.

"I found it boss!" Tony exclaimed a few moments later. He hurriedly flipped it open and sat back down at his desk. "DiNozzo."

_"Hi, this is Mrs. Stevens. I'm Talia's science teacher."_

"Is everything okay?" Tony asked worriedly.

_"Well, it's nothing serious, but Talia is pretty shaken up."_

"What happened?"

_"While we were working on our lesson for the day, well, she started her period."_

Tony's face flushed. He knew this day was coming, but he was not ready for it. She was fourteen, so he knew it would be soon, but he had hoped not this soon. "Alright, I'll be there in twenty. Is she okay? I mean, is she handling it well?"

_"Mr. DiNozzo when a girl begins her period it's really, really scary. It's a completely new thing that's not talked about much and I'm sure with your…situation it's probably talked about even less. I think right now what she needs is a woman's guidance. I did all I could to calm her down and give her a few tips. I think she would be better off if the whole class hadn't erupted in laughter."_

Tony shook his head, he knew kids could be cruel but he had tried to keep his daughter away from it as much as possible, it's what dads do and even more so in his case. Letting out a sigh he continued. "Thank you for doing what you could. Tell Talia I'm on my way."

_"Of course."_

Flipping his phone shut, he got up and grabbed his gear. Walking over to Gibbs' desk he bit the inside of his cheek. "Talia needs me today. Is it okay if take the rest of the day?"

"Take what you need, Tony." Gibbs said knowingly.

Shifting feet he rubbed his forehead. "Uh, Boss. Since we don't have a case today…is it okay if I take Abbs with me? I'm gonna need her, well, Talia is going to need her. They get along so well I think it'd be for the best."

After considering his options for a few moments, Gibbs nodded. "Okay, but don't keep her all day. She is working on processing some old cold case evidence and I don't want her to get too backed up."

"Yes, Boss. Thank you." Tony said as he ran towards the elevator in the back of the building.

* * *

Running off the elevator and into Abby's lab he had to go to the ballistics lab to find her. "Abbs!"

Taking her safety headphones off she opened the door. "What is it Tony?"

"Talia needs you today. She, er…um."

"Did mother nature kick in today?" Abby asked, trying to help him out.

Relieved she found a way to put it, he nodded. "Yea and from what I hear she isn't taking it very well. I was hoping you could come and talk to her. This is one of those days I really, really wish Ziva were here."

Abby leaned in for a hug. "We all do Tony. She was a wonderful person." After a few moments of quietness, Abby let go of him, took off her lab coat, grabbed her purse, and took Tony's arm. "Ready."

* * *

The remainder of the day Tony tried to give Talia as much space as she needed. He knew this was a big change for her and didn't want to invade her privacy too much. Especially today. Abby had spent a few hours giving Talia as much comfort and advice as she could.

The scientist had always been really close to Talia ever since she had been born. Some would say she was an aunt but Tony knew that Talia considered her to be her mom. Abby was the only female in her life besides teachers which he knew weren't ideal to talk to. He couldn't thank Abby enough for always being there for them.

That night after Abby had left, Tony went into Talia's room where she was curled up in bed. "Hey Rosie, how are you? It was a tough day, wasn't it?"

A faint nod could be seen coming from underneath her covers.

Smiling faintly, he went over and sat down on the side of her bed. "Is there anything I can do for you? I mean, I know I can't tell you that I know how it feels…"

She shrugged her shoulders then snuggled deeper underneath the covers.

"Hey," he said, brushing the hair away from her face. "I'm not going to leave until you say something."

Turning over onto her other side to face Tony, she sighed. "I just want to be left alone, dad. There's nothing you can do."

"Maybe not to stop the pain, but I can try and make you smile."

"I doubt it."

"Hmm. Okay, I take that as a challenge." After thinking for a few moments, he ran off into the kitchen.

Once her dad had been gone for over a minute, Talia sat up in bed, very curious about what he was planning. She had learned pretty early in life that she didn't have a normal dad, but she loved him for it. His goofball personality had made her worst days turn into her best.

Tony arrived in Talia's room a few minutes later. "Okay, ready to smile?"

She looked at her dad strangely. "Um, what am I supposed to be smiling at?"

Smirking, he went over to her and picked her up, carrying her into the living room.

While she was being carried Talia's jaw dropped. "What are you doing?"

Tony smiled at her. "You'll find out."

Once they reached the living room, he playfully plopped her onto the couch then disappeared into the kitchen.

Pulling a blanket off the side of the couch, Talia pulled it over her while she was waiting to find out just what her dad was planning for her.

Less than a minute later he walked back into the living room with two big bowls of popcorn. With a big smile on his face he handed her one of them and set his down on the coffee table.

Going over to his big bookshelf of movies, he picked out Talia's absolute favorite, _Father of the Bride_. After he had put the movie in and settled down beside his daughter, she looked over to him with a smile on her face as she snuggled into his chest. "Thanks daddy."

* * *

"NO, Talia. I will not allow it!" Tony exclaimed after his daughter had begged and begged him for permission to go out to the senior after party.

"Dad! You're not being fair! I've gotten good—great grades throughout all my school years, why can't I go to just this one party? It's my senior year! I want to have some fun before I go to college!"

"Oh, you're going to have _plenty_ of fun in college, believe me. But I'm still not letting you go to that party."

"Why not?" she shouted. "Mom would have let me."

Rubbing a hand over his face, he shook his head. "No, Rosie, she wouldn't."

"How do you know?" she shot back.

"Because, Taila! I was married to her."

"It's still not fair. All of my—"

"Yea, yea. I know. 'All of my friends are going, so why can't I?'" He added in a mocking tone. "Look. I've been to my share of high school and college parties. I know what they're like and I'm not going to let you go."

Talia huffed then turned on her heel to her room then slammed the door behind her.

Tony walked over to the couch and just sat there. He didn't know what to do. He'd mostly been the dad who always gave the permission first; he figured as long as she got good grades she could have fun, safe fun, that is. Once nearly a half an hour had passed, he got up and poured a couple glasses of lemonade then went to Talia's room.

Stopping in front of her closed door he gently knocked. "Talia, open up." He could have just walked in if he wanted to, but he knew how important privacy was for any teenager. Tony had made it a point early on that you weren't allowed to use the lock on your bedroom door. He had made the rule in the first place for when she was really little if she needed him and she had accidentally locked herself in.

A few moments later he could hear her climbing off her bed and walking towards the door. After pausing for a bit, she let him in. Talia resumed her old position on her bed and Tony sat on the floor. Handing her a cup of lemonade, he took a sip of his own. "You want to tell me what's going on? I know this party isn't _that_ important that you would act like this."

Shrugging her shoulders, she played with her drink. "It's nothing."

"Keep trying."

Sighing, she looked him in the eyes. "I've always been fine with just having a dad, you know that. I think you've done a good job raising me. It's just that…I miss mom. Even though I never met her, I can feel that a part of me is missing."

Nodding his head, he got up to sit next to her. "I know. I feel that way every day." Pausing, he put his arm around his daughter. "Sometimes life is very cruel and unfortunately we had to experience life at its harshest when your mom passed away. We just have to remember that she'll always be here for us in spirit when we need her. You know that she loved you with all of her heart, right?"

Talia smiled. "Yes, I do, dad. Every time Gibbs, Tim, or Abby comes over we always end up talking about her, that's what I love about our family. We never forget the important things in life."

Pulling her close, he kissed her cheek. "Amen."


End file.
